tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-60597962618812776782024-03-05T18:59:50.375-08:00I Eat Found ThingsBradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.comBlogger99125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-38492574167963303722012-07-21T18:19:00.001-07:002012-07-21T18:19:44.087-07:00I made this:<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhboIRkmmXMxFrZmE4VnIikkUN6TXUikyny-GPLjZrSEcQhgvPacxwU6uBHIqVXkkqdvT3jrjREempGL7YH7CQvD6T8EBY2DYD6K2-_XQfTTUKpr8GiiBb4kQSpAXjWY2X-r9o7A1_9aDyX/s640/blogger-image-35645884.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhboIRkmmXMxFrZmE4VnIikkUN6TXUikyny-GPLjZrSEcQhgvPacxwU6uBHIqVXkkqdvT3jrjREempGL7YH7CQvD6T8EBY2DYD6K2-_XQfTTUKpr8GiiBb4kQSpAXjWY2X-r9o7A1_9aDyX/s640/blogger-image-35645884.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-7402554937894021682012-07-05T17:22:00.001-07:002012-07-05T17:22:41.582-07:00So Your Friend Needs Top Secret Clearance | Thought CatalogI wrote this:<br />
<br />
<a href="http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/so-your-friend-needs-top-secret-clearance/#.T_YvuHH9KU4.blogger">So Your Friend Needs Top Secret Clearance | Thought Catalog</a>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-15419502302390535362012-07-01T11:15:00.003-07:002012-07-01T11:15:39.547-07:00<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzl-KuJpoOSQFLmh-nj5da-2ZFNOwAV-jmLjvue-DFpLoxr3d1_zmFHcKGxRaYexKows95mu-iTJqQk9cDhyphenhyphenkgArTVrBIUGUU-qeGOEmBQlyzWg6mclLLgEpOMaxKGDzROVtBJ9sVhTwIS/s640/blogger-image--686480850.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzl-KuJpoOSQFLmh-nj5da-2ZFNOwAV-jmLjvue-DFpLoxr3d1_zmFHcKGxRaYexKows95mu-iTJqQk9cDhyphenhyphenkgArTVrBIUGUU-qeGOEmBQlyzWg6mclLLgEpOMaxKGDzROVtBJ9sVhTwIS/s640/blogger-image--686480850.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-5888760892865669102012-06-27T13:52:00.001-07:002012-06-27T13:52:31.545-07:00<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXoEn8JlE5Vs_fvFHpkEG0w6rdc_L5wbZEnX-3DF6XULfQiZxc-Lo2QPDe0GsAZu_HcK3bHejkihmU5dNqyDHy0M05AHlZqIdTHuKO1uDtZWbM8zAWaOF8F8hApnCETjSDW0jb75NJjzV5/s640/blogger-image-486477779.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXoEn8JlE5Vs_fvFHpkEG0w6rdc_L5wbZEnX-3DF6XULfQiZxc-Lo2QPDe0GsAZu_HcK3bHejkihmU5dNqyDHy0M05AHlZqIdTHuKO1uDtZWbM8zAWaOF8F8hApnCETjSDW0jb75NJjzV5/s640/blogger-image-486477779.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-83445457571784058032012-06-27T07:41:00.001-07:002012-06-27T07:41:42.122-07:00<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgI_aYlyh_TNZ8f5n0wrNFBPlIPGmT_gAWbxS49WPDhg8NDntdTFH4UI9to5lPq6Zi92eejU8oyjjrUfrzahCl2NL_ffcGBpJxOjs1cNTnDqxX3MAWwZhVlB_yMpoFAWf7xj-QfxdzeCKq1/s640/blogger-image--810514776.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgI_aYlyh_TNZ8f5n0wrNFBPlIPGmT_gAWbxS49WPDhg8NDntdTFH4UI9to5lPq6Zi92eejU8oyjjrUfrzahCl2NL_ffcGBpJxOjs1cNTnDqxX3MAWwZhVlB_yMpoFAWf7xj-QfxdzeCKq1/s640/blogger-image--810514776.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-27080905293441106472012-06-18T23:51:00.003-07:002012-06-18T23:51:58.090-07:00<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_3U3t6Qa4TLIV0r_GE0TQkcZBEI8tVdWrGXFtgpYb_dm71miE_V8iOFOONza0QgeHDhQSZtfIDP1PkJgTLHZfRGdnyL_VJCmt0Tck0MLku8GcyfmtXxoCwscDc65EyTR6exvpmM8Kw_Yl/s640/blogger-image--2057561982.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh_3U3t6Qa4TLIV0r_GE0TQkcZBEI8tVdWrGXFtgpYb_dm71miE_V8iOFOONza0QgeHDhQSZtfIDP1PkJgTLHZfRGdnyL_VJCmt0Tck0MLku8GcyfmtXxoCwscDc65EyTR6exvpmM8Kw_Yl/s640/blogger-image--2057561982.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-88656440515882674902012-06-18T23:51:00.001-07:002012-06-18T23:51:44.171-07:00<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPyOzxd4Iyr-bl8zYdXU_tTpKSMBT7IHiiBKkJ8qOaY5yOhHBJwf7Kqd47gf_hN4KxBcVKnCUJedr_NOgrDP7EqcJSLHtIk8GuovqWACZ_-7mxf_bTO0Gi-QXsuV_4lClS0XeCml4kJ6Xt/s640/blogger-image-737890081.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPyOzxd4Iyr-bl8zYdXU_tTpKSMBT7IHiiBKkJ8qOaY5yOhHBJwf7Kqd47gf_hN4KxBcVKnCUJedr_NOgrDP7EqcJSLHtIk8GuovqWACZ_-7mxf_bTO0Gi-QXsuV_4lClS0XeCml4kJ6Xt/s640/blogger-image-737890081.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-17623359459428788292012-06-17T21:05:00.001-07:002012-06-17T21:05:23.235-07:00<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhh6W_oeNyJcme4tXCbKVgBkB4YvjVpixkSmNe5a091qY2F_SODlwYO3e1OjPmlrlG2VtRGTtKhVk2QcNgMar5EMsNyhWVjLJxohG5G6fiFFyoHe7tc7bNBYQToSpdWmtAtLasP994-75c5/s640/blogger-image--1735997588.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhh6W_oeNyJcme4tXCbKVgBkB4YvjVpixkSmNe5a091qY2F_SODlwYO3e1OjPmlrlG2VtRGTtKhVk2QcNgMar5EMsNyhWVjLJxohG5G6fiFFyoHe7tc7bNBYQToSpdWmtAtLasP994-75c5/s640/blogger-image--1735997588.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-58496006278467462672012-06-17T11:19:00.001-07:002012-06-17T11:19:01.475-07:00<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipry3xyg9xKzlof_DxOP7Z9Zw-M_ofzFKYGiSawxqgRAxv33JTQSLBlnJ8rhGOj-VpQV_XyQLxnrRa6jJ5gT8dAx8HSyASvPaD7Pkhb8YYvKaY8wX6lN7V56e7AEEQZ-GkSmnVNjVb5lD7/s640/blogger-image-1158144588.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipry3xyg9xKzlof_DxOP7Z9Zw-M_ofzFKYGiSawxqgRAxv33JTQSLBlnJ8rhGOj-VpQV_XyQLxnrRa6jJ5gT8dAx8HSyASvPaD7Pkhb8YYvKaY8wX6lN7V56e7AEEQZ-GkSmnVNjVb5lD7/s640/blogger-image-1158144588.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-37930026317544598162012-06-14T20:40:00.001-07:002012-06-14T20:40:20.982-07:00Oh no. Guess who discovered the new Lisa Frank app?<br />
<br />
<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzLScgLP5a5XQQwJUOtmEucCQVoeD1MEZnDjupVITGphDvkH0QIt2oguTIr31jksWYT9GkeGrjqhPXRWF61UqTd5gGVWGTbarqUcH1_KUWlNTzx3wfXgE7aDWg9J8IYYEt3OiRDBUuolXL/s640/blogger-image-1298718042.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzLScgLP5a5XQQwJUOtmEucCQVoeD1MEZnDjupVITGphDvkH0QIt2oguTIr31jksWYT9GkeGrjqhPXRWF61UqTd5gGVWGTbarqUcH1_KUWlNTzx3wfXgE7aDWg9J8IYYEt3OiRDBUuolXL/s640/blogger-image-1298718042.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNIYYDCVDhyhf_YLPy-Mx2753QOXgiJ8TY62PVGNaE9ZgjMuF4qYMvoz2N91EHlQwyACJJmzurRFmpabxSESzHD7JZsBAYYjbVgIBO6SGjGaoKzzfd7xaD7cgF9AqeZUY5WQkwX6aKUFE6/s640/blogger-image--1775516568.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNIYYDCVDhyhf_YLPy-Mx2753QOXgiJ8TY62PVGNaE9ZgjMuF4qYMvoz2N91EHlQwyACJJmzurRFmpabxSESzHD7JZsBAYYjbVgIBO6SGjGaoKzzfd7xaD7cgF9AqeZUY5WQkwX6aKUFE6/s640/blogger-image--1775516568.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhm7Qnvfrd4IlUIrLYvAGIpgM1iS3MoBVLAdpdWRBsLQGRsnV9p5AYm7gGGqRp21wMQPmBq1GOS-hSAXVBjXU5V_CKL027iHMZ7NcRYKqXo8bIFnLoeqaw7bBKtPdCfFREkTLHGoVHP8707/s640/blogger-image-1947215959.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhm7Qnvfrd4IlUIrLYvAGIpgM1iS3MoBVLAdpdWRBsLQGRsnV9p5AYm7gGGqRp21wMQPmBq1GOS-hSAXVBjXU5V_CKL027iHMZ7NcRYKqXo8bIFnLoeqaw7bBKtPdCfFREkTLHGoVHP8707/s640/blogger-image-1947215959.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsVJmhrTVtFuTzVt1hNTl33g1HqILDyVZirdHnolWEQ5Pb6_hJk_-gPdAvr8lxYGxNTFR4cIVq34BxYd7ZGC9xSyKp1iGggm5D0wSvhUR8Gn3HaquAtFuxlNTP-YzbFwKZf0rHexXUfISX/s640/blogger-image-1536374854.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsVJmhrTVtFuTzVt1hNTl33g1HqILDyVZirdHnolWEQ5Pb6_hJk_-gPdAvr8lxYGxNTFR4cIVq34BxYd7ZGC9xSyKp1iGggm5D0wSvhUR8Gn3HaquAtFuxlNTP-YzbFwKZf0rHexXUfISX/s640/blogger-image-1536374854.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-62155631485759922742012-06-06T04:39:00.001-07:002012-06-06T04:43:20.755-07:00<a href="http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/how-to-perform-improv/">How to Perform Improv</a>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-41019273345168373362012-06-06T04:37:00.001-07:002012-06-06T04:37:14.260-07:00<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjo3yX9njJ415lp4eAYRDcC4OtHr47SMobFyQ3K_A4WV_afMi49c0DEu-rzg5lL7mryRk7I4E9LV6b-BAIn2dJYz19_qf4KxkNQHD5HOYlxrfv0gF9vF79VYhh_1fomR8IjvB6yZfNIkBeE/s640/blogger-image-252722124.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjo3yX9njJ415lp4eAYRDcC4OtHr47SMobFyQ3K_A4WV_afMi49c0DEu-rzg5lL7mryRk7I4E9LV6b-BAIn2dJYz19_qf4KxkNQHD5HOYlxrfv0gF9vF79VYhh_1fomR8IjvB6yZfNIkBeE/s640/blogger-image-252722124.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-56159184112405974222012-06-04T23:49:00.003-07:002012-06-04T23:49:58.512-07:00<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTqAdGqhaBDsfkrfqUQSPotnJSxSWeEule4V9smkQGVn5Hodc5V1x8so4QGv2JzuFAZZZyTq20sYybyodEWZ-aNdzDUrDYVi5wY20oZ9Z2XrqsJMlnhbB8eeoEWYeAL-DziVHLnLFV_tdd/s640/blogger-image-13204954.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTqAdGqhaBDsfkrfqUQSPotnJSxSWeEule4V9smkQGVn5Hodc5V1x8so4QGv2JzuFAZZZyTq20sYybyodEWZ-aNdzDUrDYVi5wY20oZ9Z2XrqsJMlnhbB8eeoEWYeAL-DziVHLnLFV_tdd/s640/blogger-image-13204954.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-43078543840337414142012-06-04T23:49:00.001-07:002012-06-04T23:49:05.984-07:00<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWOTmNxmHoPP2-LyAJsV5qKKCPCfBisJgSNOE0le8bPL_AkClCG6VP7UdT4cHUy_oNXZaQfqoDClNy3J6HzDA5vGMiAjDpK1m62st2fnfztBIQsZobWDAF-K3SClb0fqCIHwzV-QSca5DW/s640/blogger-image--1029932932.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWOTmNxmHoPP2-LyAJsV5qKKCPCfBisJgSNOE0le8bPL_AkClCG6VP7UdT4cHUy_oNXZaQfqoDClNy3J6HzDA5vGMiAjDpK1m62st2fnfztBIQsZobWDAF-K3SClb0fqCIHwzV-QSca5DW/s640/blogger-image--1029932932.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-53675930764224831792012-06-04T23:48:00.001-07:002012-06-04T23:48:20.404-07:00<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5DkGn6QQYuKrXh23gtu64SlBDlzcQgZFLe5aPeFQj4oRLDMITXUAyJERm1FdDYLwmLrdnz4U8nKPw89hgwrqP8y08qU5_JLp_u-xb4ZGpLJHS75oYtwQuA4zd7NLnaz41PFkrljGb6n6r/s640/blogger-image-185226734.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5DkGn6QQYuKrXh23gtu64SlBDlzcQgZFLe5aPeFQj4oRLDMITXUAyJERm1FdDYLwmLrdnz4U8nKPw89hgwrqP8y08qU5_JLp_u-xb4ZGpLJHS75oYtwQuA4zd7NLnaz41PFkrljGb6n6r/s640/blogger-image-185226734.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-21184264055133130872012-06-04T23:47:00.001-07:002012-06-04T23:47:38.588-07:00<div class="separator"style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWQociFbs8Pby-ROkeq2Iira-zBRc7wCXBOGaOHxBy-LYBtAsxBWm68NQQCnNY8sxPtHm6V2a58y1QpoDlyjlJ_LMfxA8ALchRjeeboqlarj5sn083fStPd6EF-f7d3uwracISV9TmxDKD/s640/blogger-image--103957386.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWQociFbs8Pby-ROkeq2Iira-zBRc7wCXBOGaOHxBy-LYBtAsxBWm68NQQCnNY8sxPtHm6V2a58y1QpoDlyjlJ_LMfxA8ALchRjeeboqlarj5sn083fStPd6EF-f7d3uwracISV9TmxDKD/s640/blogger-image--103957386.jpg" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-5127970254250798862012-03-15T19:34:00.003-07:002012-03-15T19:36:06.184-07:00I'm an idiot. You're welcome.<br />
<br />
<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Tpp0rUMotWc" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-55306789924583438752011-09-19T23:25:00.001-07:002011-09-19T23:25:06.156-07:00<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:WordDocument> <w:View>Normal</w:View> <w:Zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:Compatibility> <w:BreakWrappedTables/> <w:SnapToGridInCell/> <w:WrapTextWithPunct/> <w:UseAsianBreakRules/> </w:Compatibility> <w:BrowserLevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style>
/* Style Definitions */
table.MsoNormalTable
{mso-style-name:"Table Normal";
mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0;
mso-tstyle-colband-size:0;
mso-style-noshow:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt;
mso-para-margin:0in;
mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:10.0pt;
font-family:"Times New Roman";}
</style> <![endif]--> <br />
<div class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">I Am the Worst Teacher</b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">“What’s your poem about,” I ask</div><div class="MsoNormal">The little girl in the front row.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">“Death nullifies hope and love,</div><div class="MsoNormal">And the world will forget us.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">She smiles and holds up the paper.</div><div class="MsoNormal">It’s written with ten different crayons.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">“That’s wonderful,” I exclaim.</div><div class="MsoNormal">“I love the part about forgetting.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I move on to the next desk,</div><div class="MsoNormal">A little boy using markers and glue.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">“What’s your poem about,” I ask,</div><div class="MsoNormal">And I see he’s drawn skeletons all over it.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">“Mine is about dead bodies in graveyards.</div><div class="MsoNormal">And all the wasted suit jackets underground.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">“Genius!” I exclaim.</div><div class="MsoNormal">“Death is such a rich and powerful subject.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I move on to the next desk,</div><div class="MsoNormal">A little girl with pig tails.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">“What is your poem about,” I ask.</div><div class="MsoNormal">She looks at her feet, shakes her head.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">“Please tell me,” I plead.</div><div class="MsoNormal">“I’m sure it’s brilliant.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Her fingers clench the paper,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Lips pursed to the side.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">“It’s about an old grandfather</div><div class="MsoNormal">Who rapes his grandson in the basement.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">“Yours is the best poem of all,” I proclaim.</div><div class="MsoNormal">“You get a gold star on the wall.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Her pride bubbles up onto her face,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Washing her eyes with sparkle.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Her classmates pout and sneer,</div><div class="MsoNormal">Wishing they had thought of it.</div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-42227059027904567112011-09-19T17:26:00.000-07:002011-09-19T17:27:03.100-07:00<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicF5DSLZcFooUAiemSjjCXuPrRgN41uRSfIvGhSaF_UhTX7SljQ0nneguVOUGYPKcHxOuZrIYxx1QipacApLnaiCcTPJJ7sAamC4KuaBNg5yVtw1kG67gvnmvS_VyvFvTwSfQ5AzcCpn_F/s1600/horse.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicF5DSLZcFooUAiemSjjCXuPrRgN41uRSfIvGhSaF_UhTX7SljQ0nneguVOUGYPKcHxOuZrIYxx1QipacApLnaiCcTPJJ7sAamC4KuaBNg5yVtw1kG67gvnmvS_VyvFvTwSfQ5AzcCpn_F/s400/horse.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-37718064971538701872011-09-18T13:58:00.001-07:002011-09-18T13:58:47.435-07:00I'm on twitter for some reason: @brad_pikeBradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-42079495889942643542011-09-17T22:27:00.001-07:002011-09-17T22:27:26.625-07:00I did this painting.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTaI-QnMBWd-0L_lfiurrmH28PBsYR8xGYURqmG4vQu9RPmgxExd979Gn4e4QmN4z5k01AV-rclRXwhP7aWRDPS5v0JfE7enk9pcYUvdU79wCoBss3ErB_0C84cOtTSocs6uubnc8uzCUg/s1600/birdinasnowstorm.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" rba="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTaI-QnMBWd-0L_lfiurrmH28PBsYR8xGYURqmG4vQu9RPmgxExd979Gn4e4QmN4z5k01AV-rclRXwhP7aWRDPS5v0JfE7enk9pcYUvdU79wCoBss3ErB_0C84cOtTSocs6uubnc8uzCUg/s320/birdinasnowstorm.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-40373399862786936092011-09-02T15:44:00.001-07:002011-09-02T15:44:20.825-07:00I wrote this thing about how unhealthy I am, and how I'm an obnoxious person sometimes.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://thoughtcatalog.com/2011/things-i-do-after-drinking-two-energy-drinks/">http://thoughtcatalog.com/2011/things-i-do-after-drinking-two-energy-drinks/</a>Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-54372175727581765932011-08-30T16:44:00.000-07:002011-08-30T16:44:32.044-07:00<strong>I Am Very Angry</strong><br />
<br />
There's this thing I wanted you to do--<br />
You didn't do it!<br />
Or you didn't do it correctly!<br />
Now I'm very angry with you,<br />
So angry I'm forced to tell you about it:<br />
<br />
My emotional state should be approximately happy.<br />
I should be content, satisfied, passive, sated.<br />
Instead, I feel this void in my life<br />
Where the happiness would be,<br />
The happiness which would have resulted <br />
From the thing you should have done <br />
When I asked you to do it,<br />
<br />
Goddammit.<br />
<br />
If I use greater lung capacity, <br />
Higher volume, and sharper enunciation,<br />
Will you be persuaded not to make the same mistake again,<br />
Or correct the mistake you've already made?<br />
<br />
This is very taxing for me emotionally--<br />
Scolding you like this--<br />
So I hope something's getting through,<br />
and I'm not dumping my inventory of passion<br />
Into an unfeeling, uncaring, unsympathetic furnace.<br />
<br />
I want you to squirm but not to cry.<br />
Crying makes me feel like a cruel person,<br />
So you need to shut up and absorb this berating<br />
With a sufficiently anxious frown.<br />
<br />
When I was a small child,<br />
I often found myself monologuing in empty rooms.<br />
I need you to be here to listen to this<br />
Or I will look like a crazy person yelling at the wall.<br />
<br />
My skull is filled with razor blades.<br />
Did I say that out loud?<br />
I want to eat your dumb eyeballs.<br />
You're being so stupid right now.Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-20202941683206867192011-08-22T23:17:00.000-07:002011-08-22T23:17:02.332-07:00<strong>Internet Sage</strong><br />
<br />
He has seen every youtube video.<br />
He has read every Tweet.<br />
He's memorized everyone's newsfeed.<br />
He has viewed every tumblr,<br />
Every image macro, every animated gif.<br />
He has absorbed every article<br />
On every blog, webzine, and news site.<br />
He knows the names of everyone on Facebook--<br />
Their interests, favorite bands and movies.<br />
He remembers every comment you've ever posted.<br />
He's seen all the LOLcats,<br />
And he's seen every clip of pornography,<br />
Gruesome beheadings, and celebrities smoking crack.<br />
He's explored the internet's deepest recesses,<br />
Its darkest corners, its hidden crannies.<br />
He finally understands it all.<br />
A wave of clarity washes over him.<br />
An ethereal light shines down.<br />
His body vibrates with the electric rhythm of the universe<br />
As well as cumulative red bull consumption.<br />
And a great cosmic truth blooms in his mind:<br />
He needs to get a fucking job.Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6059796261881277678.post-16276386857514594152011-08-22T22:25:00.000-07:002011-08-22T22:25:13.462-07:00There is no blogger app for the iPad. This is disappointing. Bradhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09940066078524371751noreply@blogger.com0